


Aural Adventures - Playlist 1

by Castastrophe



Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Angst, Cross-Post, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, GTOP, Hurt/Comfort, Inspired by Music, M/M, Smut, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-01
Updated: 2016-03-01
Packaged: 2018-05-24 03:38:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6140383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castastrophe/pseuds/Castastrophe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lengthy series of standalone GTOP one shots and drabbles based off of a collective playlist of songs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1-1

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to one person and one person alone, for being one of the most amazing people in the entire world and continuing to make me feel things over GTOP. They know damn well who they are.
> 
> I didn't forget about those playlists, just been kind of rolling around in them for a while. 
> 
> This will be updated super slowly, as I listen to songs on repeat for forty years at a time.  
> There'll be some summaries at the start of every chap/fic, warnings inclusive etc.  
> Just to clarify - every chapter is a standalone one shot. The fics are not connected to each other in any way unless stated otherwise.  
> And to the person these are for - Thank you. You inspire me. 
> 
> (cross posted from AFF, has since been removed from AFF.)

_**Summary - Seunghyun is in a respectable job, just like the world wants him, so why is he so miserable? A chance encounter with a beautiful boy at an infrequently visited club on Seunghyun's list might just have the answers.**_  

_Rating - Teen and up_

_Setting - AU club encounter, accountant SH/music producer JY_

_Warnings - n/a._

* * *

 

Seunghyun was never one for diving in.

 

There were too many risks in the world as it was without him actively seeking them out.

 

He was young, full of energy, bursting with potential. He was at a good point in his life and not looking at throwing it all into a spiral downwards for the sake of one man. Nope, he wasn't gonna do it.

 

He told himself those words over and over, trying to convince himself of his own sincerity, but it was hard.

 

Twenty five years young, he was in charge of his own future, on the right kind of path to success. He was all but running the accounting firm he worked at, the dollars rolling is as quickly as he could update the details on his computer. Life was easy, and he was pretty sure he was more than capable of keeping it that way. That is, he was, until he'd gone to the local club on a whim the night before and was left reeling by the nymph he'd met there.

 

Jiyong Kwon.

 

Seunghyun had noticed him at first because he was hard pressed to find another Korean in this city, and yet there one was, gummy grin plastered across his face as he shimmied and bounced all over the floor. He was like the woodland equivalent of the energiser bunny - lime green hair, smokey brown liner and eyeshadow, a fucking flower crown perched upon his head. Needless to say, Seunghyun was not the only one noticing the boy. Surprisingly enough, however, Seunghyun seemed to be the only one being noticed by him, and when the beautiful creature locked bright blue eyes with him and allowed his grin to grow, Seunghyun was half convinced he had been drugged. These kinds of things didn't happen to him, he reminded himself, as the boy had sashayed over and rocked up on his toes to speak into Seunghyun's ear.

 

"You look lost!" He heard the boy's mirthful remark, as he pulled back and was met with a gaze brighter than anything had any right to be.

"I... haven't been clubbing in a while. It's not really my scene anymore," Seunghyun reluctantly admitted, and the boy laughed, clutching at the lapels of Seunghyun's coat and coaxing him onto the dancefloor.

"No offence, but I can tell," the boy teased, "Jiyong Kwon."

"Seunghyun Choi," Seunghyun had managed, as Jiyong's fingers had trailed down his arm and entangled with his own.  

"Well, Seunghyun," Jiyong offered with a laugh, coyly looking up from beneath a fan of thick lashes, "For tonight, maybe this is your scene."

 

Seunghyun had been well and truly gone then, like swan diving off of the top of a building. He'd later blame it on alcohol, his loose limbs and the smile that kept edging its way across his lips, but in truth, he'd barely even been tipsy. It had all been Jiyong. Seunghyun had been ensnared by the boy's laughter, his ethereal appearance, his beautifully bright smile. When they'd grown too tired of dancing, they'd sat and they'd spoken in the interims, and Seunghyun had been captivated. Despite Jiyong's endless youth, he was only one year Seunghyun's junior. While Seunghyun spent day after day crammed into an office for a job that, admittedly, he didn’t even like all that much, Jiyong worked as a music producer at one of the local studios. Jiyong admitted that yes, a lot of the time, he was also crammed in a box of the physical sense, but he was happy. He was happy, and from time to time, he got to head to bars, clubs, concerts, anywhere that music might inspire him. He let his life be dictated by living, not by the tired and rundown obligations that Seunghyun felt his own was attached to.

 

Jiyong cared about everything, had passion for every aspect of his life, spent every waking moment taking risks, making rash decisions, and he was all the more beautiful for it.

 

Seunghyun ached.

 

For the first time in several years, he spilled his own anxieties on the table, shared his concerns with Jiyong, his miseries, and the younger had curled a hand around Seunghyun’s fingers, brows furrowed as he shook his head.

“You have no idea how much better my life became when I let my life become mine,” Jiyong had murmured, urgent, pleading, “I was doing pre-med, Seunghyun. Can you imagine it? Me, as a doctor? It’s what my folks wanted though, what society saw as respectable, and I went along with it. I lived for them. Don’t do that. Live for you.”

 

Seunghyun had been floored.

 

They’d spent the rest of the night talking, dancing, growing closer in every sense of the word, until Jiyong had swayed closer still, arms looping around Seunghyun’s neck as he stared up in open fascination.

“You are a beautiful man, Seunghyun Choi,” He had said just loud enough to be heard over the music, as one of his hands had drifted down and rest palm flat against Seunghyun’s chest, “And the rest of you is in here somewhere. So, Seunghyun, I have a question for you.”

Seunghyun had exhaled a little shakily, snagged by the other’s gaze, throat dry and body wanting.

“ Yes?”

“Why are you holding yourself back?”

 

Seunghyun didn’t have an answer, and even if he had, he may not have been able to voice it as his mouth had gravitated towards the younger’s.

 

Seunghyun had been living for twenty five years up until this point, but it was with Jiyong in his arms, his mouth, his thoughts that he had first felt alive.

 

They had parted ways at the end of the night, phone numbers exchanged and hearts light, Seunghyun toppled well and truly off of the rail.

 

As he sat now, staring at his computer screen, drifting from his memory of the boy, he tried to reign his thoughts under control. He wouldn’t give it all up, wouldn’t let it all go to chase happiness. He knew that reality and fantasy were two very separate things. He’d longed, once upon a time, to work as an author. He liked numbers enough, but words were where his passion lay. The only problem had been that writing wasn’t going to get him weekly pay checks. He wasn’t going to be making anybody but himself proud that way, if he were to achieve anything at all. He’d let it go before he’d properly even leashed it and he had quashed it for years now, only for it to be at the very forefront of his mind because of one surreal night with a Korean woodland nymph and too much alcohol.

 

Too much alcohol.

 

He pressed his hands to his eyes, letting out a long sigh as his heart ached terribly in his chest. Because Jiyong was right.  As if a sign from the universe itself, a text message came through from the boy himself.

‘In the studio. Great band in today, reminding me of the best parts of high school. Been thinking of you a lot.I thought of you at your desk, probably in some shitty little office where the only music in your ears are the telephones around you, and it hurts. You’re more than that, I know it. Life is GOOD, Seunghyun. Let it be good for YOU. x’

 

A smile licked at Seunghyun’s lips, his eyes flicking back to his computer as a new email came in. More requests, more demands, more numbers to be crunched and money to be made. The smile was dying before it even had a chance to fully form, and that’s when Seunghyun knew. He loosened his tie, opened a new email, and began typing, a smile already licking across his lips once again, wondering if Jiyong would still be at the studio by the time he got there. He clicked send and grabbed his things, heading out of the door before his boss had even had time to read the four most liberating words Seunghyun had ever typed.

 

‘I resign, effective immediately’.

 


	2. 1-2

_**Summary - Jiyong's life is on a slow spiral out of control. His parents worry, he worries, but it just seems as if that's the only way for him to cope. Until Seunghyun comes along.** _

_Rating: T_  
Setting: Established relationship sort of, hurt/comfort domestic kind of fluff  
Warnings: Mentions of drug use, mentions of anxiety/panic attacks

* * *

 

 

Jiyong was deeply flawed, he knew that better than anyone. 

Each day that passed by was often spent on shitty shifts at the bar, endless nights at clubs, or sprawled out on his bedroom floor, high off his ass as he pointedly ignored the distressed monologues his mother would offer through his closed door.   
"I just worry about you, Jiyongah," she'd always finish on, and the distant part of his mind that was still vaguely coherent would agree with her. 

Sometimes he worried himself too. 

But he was changing. Or at least, he was trying to change. There had to be merit in it, he was sure. Because some nights after his shift at the bar, he'd walk right by his favourite club, wouldn't text his dealer, would instead stand upon the threshold of an apartment way out of his price range and ring the doorbell with the same dull thud of anxious anticipation. 

Some days he'd seek out Seunghyun. 

Jiyong didn't really do relationships. He'd never felt a need in the past, acutely aware that if he was barely able to keep himself together, it probably wasn't wise to commit to supporting someone else as well. But this, whatever he and Seunghyun were? He was becoming oddly dependant on it, and maybe that was okay. 

He rocked back on his heels, his chest tight, as he heard approaching footsteps from behind the door.  The lock clicked and the door opened, the quiet affection across Seunghyun's features setting the butterflies in Jiyong's stomach into chaos.   
"Jiyong," Seunghyun smiled, soft and inviting, "I wasn't expecting you this evening."  
Jiyong had said he planned to hit the clubs, so he wasn't surprised by Seunghyun's statement. He almost had headed to The Marquee, but had hovered outside the building for a few moments, his heart just not in it. 

Work had been stressful, too busy for his overactive mind. He was exhausted, particularly vulnerable. He'd been tempted to head home and get blazed off his ass to try and block it out, but when he'd started walking, he'd somehow ended up here.   
"Sorry," Jiyong lifted a shoulder in an awkward shrug, shifting on his feet, "I can go if you're busy, or--"  
"Don't be stupid," Seunghyun cut him off, long fingers reaching out and lacing with Jiyong's, tugging him inside and closing the door behind them. 

A sigh fell unbidden from Jiyong's lips then, as Seunghyun pulled him close, enveloping the younger in his arms and pressing a kiss into his hair.   
"Bad day?" Seunghyun asked softly, and Jiyong merely nodded, burying his face into the crook of Seunghyun's neck and his fingers into the soft knit of the man's sweater. Jiyong could never explain it, but since he had met Seunghyun on a bender one night, and the older man had taken care of him without taking advantage, Seunghyun had been a safe and warm part of his life that Jiyong couldn't seem to let go of. 

He'd met Seunghyun again, sober this time, as he worked at the bar. Seunghyun had taken up a stool at the counter, and had sat and spoken to Jiyong through the night. He was a gentleman, kind and compassionate, soft and understanding, without ever passing judgement. Jiyong had asked for his number that night and Seunghyun had supplied it with a soft smile. 

They'd seen each other the next day, meeting for coffee whilst Jiyong was exceptionally hungover and still coming down from a high. He had worried Seunghyun, he could tell, the softness in the man's eyes almost painful to look at. When he'd tried to kiss Seunghyun as they'd parted ways, Seunghyun had pulled back, shaking his head.   
"When you come back," he had murmured softly, pressing a gentle kiss to the younger's temple instead.

The next time he saw Seunghyun, he'd been in the middle of a panic attack in the alleyway behind the bar, not long after his shift had ended. Jiyong's heart had been beating painfully in his chest, his vision swimming, his throat tight, his eyes burning with unshed tears, and it had all stemmed from getting someone's drink order wrong. Something so simple, that had clawed and gnawed at his thoughts the rest of the night, has snowballed into increasingly fanciful imaginary situations that could have resulted from his mistake. 

Seunghyun had crouched beside him, spoken in a soft and soothing tone, directed his breathing, reassured him that he wasn't actually dying like he had thought. When Jiyong had calmed enough, Seunghyun had propped himself against the wall beside him and pulled Jiyong into the V of his legs, cradling him against his chest. He'd kissed Jiyong's forehead, gently raked fingers through his hair, hushed the stray sobs that burst from Jiyong's lips, as his hummingbird heart gradually slowed and eased. Jiyong had felt safe, secure, protected in a world he often found a little too terrifying, and he had clung to Seunghyun's shirt like a life raft. 

Seunghyun grounded him, when he so often sought ways to drift away. 

It was intoxication on a whole new level. 

Jiyong breathed in the heady smell of Seunghyun's cologne now, the pair hovering in Seunghyun's doorway, and Jiyong felt oddly at home.   
"Have you eaten?" Seunghyun asked, and Jiyong shook his head again, as Seunghyun pressed another kiss to his forehead and steered him to the kitchen. 

Jiyong leaned against one of the counters, eyes bleary and heart maybe a little too full, as Seunghyun pulled out some leftover bolognese from his fridge and turned the stove on.   
"Spaghetti okay?" He asked, and Jiyong nodded with a soft smile licking at his lips.   
"There you are," Seunghyun murmured fondly, dimples emerging as Jiyong's smile grew in response, "You want to talk about it?"  
"Maybe after eating?" Jiyong suggested, stifling a yawn behind his hand, and Seunghyun nodded, cupping the side of Jiyong's face and brushing his thumb along rapidly heating skin.   
"Sounds like a plan," Seunghyun smiled, pulling back to stir at the pot on the stove, "Go get yourself curled up on the sofa and I'll bring it out to you."  
"Thank you," Jiyong offered softly, holding Seunghyun's gaze a few moments more, before retiring to the lounge. 

The first time the pair had kissed, Seunghyun had been dropping Jiyong home, after a shift at the bar. Jiyong was exhausted, but his thoughts were soft and pleasant, no nervous energy skittering along his skin. He'd had a clear mind and a little hope in his chest, as he'd thanked Seunghyun for the ride and basked in the man's soft expression of open adoration.   
"You know," Jiyong had said slowly, averting his gaze and nervously nibbling on his lips, "I'm pretty present right now..."  
Seunghyun had huffed out a soft laugh, amusement thick in his tone.   
"Is that so?"  
"Oh, definitely," Jiyong grinned cheekily, and Seunghyun's eyes had been shining with mirth.   
"That's good news indeed," The older had murmured softly, curling fingers beneath Jiyong's chin, tilting his face as he leaned in and slowly brushed his lips against the younger's. 

Jiyong had exhaled sharply, and Seunghyun had made a quiet noise of apparent approval, before sliding his fingers into Jiyong's hair and pressing in again. It was a little firmer that time, and Jiyong had parted his lips in a breath, tentatively touching his tongue to the swell of Seunghyun's lower lip, revelling in the soft sound it drew from the older man's throat. It had been languid, cautious, full of a quiet and weighted sorted of worship that Jiyong was a little overwhelmed by. They'd pulled apart, Seunghyun exhaling long and slow, and Jiyong had ducked in again, pressing a soft kiss to the lilt of Seunghyun's smile.  
"Goodnight, Jiyongah," he murmured, voice low and husked in a way that left Jiyong wanting, but he had bid his goodnight and headed inside regardless. 

They had kissed a few times since then, never too heavy, but too intense to be deemed chaste, and it was all Jiyong could do to not think of them constantly. 

He had never experienced the whole 'going slow' thing, but he was beginning to see its merit. 

Seunghyun appeared in the lounge a few moments after Jiyong had finally gotten himself adequately comfortable and wrapped up in the mink blanket on the sofa. Seunghyun settled beside him, handing Jiyong a bowl and pressing a kiss into his hair as he turned on the TV. 

They ate in a comfortable silence, Jiyong settled by the warmth of Seunghyun's body pressed against his side and the food he hadn't realised he had been starving for. Once they were both done, Seunghyun pried Jiyong's bowl from his fingers and set both of them on the table, before manoeuvring Jiyong to lay down, his head in Seunghyun's lap as the older combed fingers through his hair. 

It was the best kind of high he'd had. 

"So, did you want to talk about it?" Seunghyun asked, voice soft and fond, and a smile eased across Jiyong's lips as he brushed his fingers against Seunghyun's thigh, grasping for his free hand.   
"Actually, I think I'm okay," he offered sleepily, warmth seeping through him as his lids grew heavy. 

And for the first time in a long time, the words didn't feel like a lie. 


End file.
